Today I left my last class ever with not a bang, but a whimper. All that was on my mind was the final next week and whether I cared enough to study or not. It wasn't even until I was later in the WC that it dawned on me. Then I was happy. Turns out most of my English friends are feeling most of the same things I am right now - glad to be done, sad to be leaving friends, excited/scared/nervous/looking forward to/running away from/etc. our destinies and impending futures. I was sitting in the lab chatting and stuff with my friends, most of them writing tutors, and as their shifts ended or whatever, I watched them leave the place to probably never come back.
Later, when it was time for me to go to work, as I walked out of that old Braithwaite building, I thought that I might never go back in that lovely writing center again, and I felt emotions that I only sort of read about in books: saying goodbye to a place you might call home, even though it might be a place where you don't live or happen to love. A book that captures that feeling of odd nostalgia is Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows at the part where Harry leaves Privet Drive for good. Speaking of HP, the movie trailer for Part II released last night. I am quite sure that my emotions today are mightily influenced by my viewing of that trailer, as were the feelings of my English friends as well. We grew up on HP. All of us. And now it's truly coming to an end.
I remember finishing the last book and feeling weird that the story was over, but I still had the movies to look forward to, then, later, I saw Deathly Hallows Part I and still felt like I had more to look forward to. Now I have the last movie to await, and when that is over, I will have nothing! I will slump and crawl under the theater seat and lie there until someone has the gall to carry or drag me away from my final resting place.
But seriously, as soon as the final film credits roll my childhood will officially be over. If there is any kind of sentimental montage set to tender music in the film I will lose all composure. I better bring some tissues to mop up my wet-cry tears. The last time that I cried during a movie in the theater was when I saw "Aladdin" at my fifth birthday party. I think I cried for the same reason I cried at the end of "Beauty and the Beast" and why other people cry at weddings: They are just so darn happy!
So anyway, I'll be sure to sit through the whole movie, credits and all, so allow myself to come to terms with the fact that it will be time to be grown up and stuff. Wouldn't it be perfect [irony] to come home from the movie to a house that's been robbed? "Welcome to being grown up!"
Back to crying at happy things, like weddings, I'm totally going to a "Royal Wedding" party at a friend's house in a few hours. Because of time zones and live broadcasting and magic and stuff like that, we will be taking part in the festivities at 2 am. I'm going to take English things that I brought home from my London Study Abroad trip to help Eglify the occasion. I'm sure the wedding will be beautious and lovely and all, but I don't think I'll cry, I won't dry-cry either.
Dry-crying is real, you guys, so don't even make fun.